Paul Nervy Notes
“Jokes, poems, stories, and a lot of philosophy, psychology, and sociology.”


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Work, technique, social.  ---  .This section is about social techniques at work.  ---  1/24/2006


Work, technique, social.  ---  (1) Do not look or act smart alecky or nonchalant (my natural pre-disposition).  Money, job, and future are on the line.  (2) Professional managerial polish: smile, calm, serious, well dressed, polite, look like you know the important problems and answers, issues and views.  Never let them see you sweat.  Sell yourself and your company through your dress, behavior, vocabulary, accent, grammar, and tone.  ---  10/30/1994


Work, technique, social.  ---  (1) Know when to press, push, and exert power or authority.  Know when to kowtow and defer.  (2) When to be friendly vs. reserved vs. cold.  (3) When to be direct and confrontational vs. indirect.  ---  09/26/1993


Work, technique, social.  ---  (1) Pick a career.  Learn about yourself: continuously, as you grow and change.  Learn about careers: what type of work is involved, pros and cons, and whether the job outlook is fading or growing.  (2) Prepare for a career.  Keep your job-related education going your whole life.  (3) Find a job.  Be persistent.  Go where the jobs are; be willing to change field or geographic location.  (4) Keep job.  Doing a good job.  Customer service is key to all who you deal with.  Be friendly.  Treat them like people.  Make them think you are dependable and on their side.  Learn to be friendly, or at least civil and cooperative to those giving you grief.  (5) Leave job: Know when it is time to move on.  Plan and prepare for your advancement.  Make your next job a step up.  ---  11/30/1996


Work, technique, social.  ---  (1) Work on public relations in word and action.  (2) Industrious (faster, longer), detail oriented, accurate, no mistakes, friendly, knowledgeable, goal minded, sharp, heads up, team player (protects other, not stupid or evil).  ---  08/20/1993


Work, technique, social.  ---  Are you kissing ass or building a relationship?  ---  10/15/1994


Work, technique, social.  ---  Armor, defenses, supports.  ---  12/30/1992


Work, technique, social.  ---  Ask boss for more information about the job, and for more responsibilities on the job.  ---  02/01/1994


Work, technique, social.  ---  Ask your boss how you are doing.  Ask them how to improve.  Tell them you like it there, and that you like them.  It is time to play the big scam.  Get them to like you and believe in you.  Suck ass.  ---  01/10/1994


Work, technique, social.  ---  Attitude.  Polite, stroke them, never offensive mean or brusk, polish and poise, serious, brass tacks, bottom line.  ---  12/30/1992


Work, technique, social.  ---  Avoid looks that say "I don't know what's going on, and I don't know what to do".  ---  12/30/1992


Work, technique, social.  ---  Be early, smile, be friendly, be optimistic, be not too jokey, be focused on the job, sharp, industrious, attentive to details, look like you are working hard, look like a leader, appealing face posture and clothes.  ---  08/31/1993


Work, technique, social.  ---  Be fair and friendly, politician and salesman.  ---  10/01/1993


Work, technique, social.  ---  Be formal and professional.  Fake, trivial, bland, and quiet.  Do not be informal, jokey, confidential, hypothetical, musing, or off color, to any degree, with anyone on the job.  Do not be excessively informal off the job either.  Because unknown strangers could be your ideological enemies.  Friends can turn into enemies.  Friends can be spies.  People could have mistaken or incomplete views of you, derived from themselves or others.  And they all could try, to any degree, to hurt or shit-can you.  ---  10/30/1994


Work, technique, social.  ---  Do everything right (procedures).  Be nice to everyone.  Work hard, and thus get out in one piece.  ---  02/24/1994


Work, technique, social.  ---  Do not act tired, lazy, confused, and dumb.  Do act sharp, energetic, knowledgeable, and accurate.  ---  08/31/1993


Work, technique, social.  ---  Do not be mean, or even cold (neutral).  Be fake friendly.  Tell them that united we stand, divided we fall.  How can I help you get ahead?  How can I make your life easier?  I appreciate you as a co-worker.  Calm and rational I am.  I would not screw you.  ---  12/01/1993


Work, technique, social.  ---  Do not give them any fodder, and do not reveal your weak spots.  Be bland and even handed.  They are gossip hounds.  Confess nothing, confide nothing, reveal nothing.  They just want to dish, they need to talk, and they'll talk about anything.  A men doll is all they want, and all they deserve.  They deserve no more.  Be cool as a cucumber, charming, sophisticated, and polite.  Give sympathy and help.  Do not take sympathy and help.  ---  11/15/1994


Work, technique, social.  ---  Don't act crazy, stupid, and low class, even if you are.  Put out good public relations.  ---  12/30/1992


Work, technique, social.  ---  Don't beg, whine, or kiss up.  If they want to fire you, fine, big deal, I wasn't that impressed by the company anyway.  Fight for your rights.  ---  01/08/1997  ---  *


Work, technique, social.  ---  Don't just keep your beliefs a secret (rock n' roll, democracy, humor, etc.).  Lie like hell to make them think you hold their beliefs.  ---  05/30/1994


Work, technique, social.  ---  Don't talk to them about anything not shallow.  You will dislike them if you find out about them.  They will dislike you if they find out about you.  They will dislike you for political reasons (being a democrat), or they will be jealous (of your brains, humor, girlfriend, etc.), or they will think you are crazy (for being poetic, or humorous).  ---  11/30/1996


Work, technique, social.  ---  Excellent performance at work can help cut you slack when you fu*k up.  ---  07/25/1993


Work, technique, social.  ---  Find cool people/friends (similar interests or points of view).  Get and give references.  Do favors, receive favors.  Build bridges.  Keep gates open.  Build networks.  Get/give jobs or job opportunity information.  Build a big brain by putting heads together.  Get new ideas.  ---  06/30/1993


Work, technique, social.  ---  Give in on the inconsequential things so that you can stand your ground and get your way on important issues.  This is the difference between brown nose ass kisser and healthy.  ---  10/27/1993


Work, technique, social.  ---  I am tired of being nice, and I am tired of taking shit.  ---  12/01/1993  ---  *


Work, technique, social.  ---  I don't want to be Mr. Gossip, Mr. Leering, Mr. Popular, Mr. Jokey, Mr. Friendly, or Mr. Flirty.  Friendliness and flirtiness only creates jealousy and misunderstanding.  Gossip creates fear of betrayal.  Jokiness makes people think you are insincere, untrustworthy, sarcastic, not serious.  She is way too jokey and informal.  Let her tell the jokes and talk about others.  I will be serious and mild mannered.  ---  10/01/1994


Work, technique, social.  ---  I enjoy challenging people, socially and intellectually.  However, on my job, it works better for me if I reassure and praise them instead.  Oh well.  I enjoy challenging myself, physically with rock climbing, and intellectually with philosophy.  ---  02/04/1994


Work, technique, social.  ---  I need them to be nice to me, and to not harass me, so that I have no worries, and so I can do well on the job and in school.  So do not be sarcastic, and do not act patronizing, condescending, or superior.  Be supportive.  ---  12/15/1994


Work, technique, social.  ---  Keep kissing ass your whole work life.  Don't make people feel threatened by trying to usurp their power.  Keep kissing butt.  Never let them know how much you look down on them.  Don't mention your knowledge.  Never reveal to them that you are superior.  Don't try to make decisions, they will only pick at them.  Don't joke around, they will think you are unstable and unworthy of leading.  Don't test their limits, do the opposite, reassure them constantly that they are valuable.  Work is beyond a game (spy vs. spy), it is a joke (illogical, unethical), it is also a role that you perform.  You entertain them.  Keep them feeling secure and happy.  Look at the world from their eyes.  See what they want and give it to them.  Make your real life and real accomplishments in the non-work world.  Never appear angry at anyone.  Never be forceful or forthright.  Do not gossip or ridicule.  Build team spirit.  Avoid power plays and power struggles.  Accept power only if offered.  If there is a duplicitous, lying, cheating, back stabber, manipulator in your midsts, be careful how you react.  They will blab badly of you if you do not cater to their whims.  They will ruin you by intimation.  Keep them all happy.  Give them attention and attentiveness.  Warmth and kindness.  They can squash you like a bug.  ---  11/15/1994


Work, technique, social.  ---  Kiss ass for (1) Good raise, (2) Good recommendation, (3) Easy time on the job.  Look good, and look like you are working hard, and look like you are into the job, because your bosses raise depends on how well you do your job.  ---  07/27/1993


Work, technique, social.  ---  Licking ass vs. kicking ass.  ---  12/30/1992


Work, technique, social.  ---  Make contacts, network, schmooze, brown nose.  ---  08/31/1993


Work, technique, social.  ---  Never be mean, or even sarcastic, or even talk about them when they are not there.  For any of them.  Be politeness man.  ---  12/01/1993


Work, technique, social.  ---  Not real.  Politeness man.  Mr. Friendly.  That is all.  ---  10/01/1993


Work, technique, social.  ---  On the job, give them what they want (like a retailer, or an entertainer).  Give them plenty of warm smiles, kind words, and soulful looks.  Reassure them.  ---  10/30/1994


Work, technique, social.  ---  On the job, people look for (1) Scapegoats to blame when they want to avoid blaming themselves.  So it pays to develop many, very close, devoted, powerful allies.  (2) Human sacrifices to blame when they don't know who to blame, or just as an outlet for their general frustrations (misdirected anger), or for their prejudices against your type, or what they mistakenly believe about you specifically.  So it pays to have absolutely no dirt of any type on you.  Squeaky clean.  (3) Also, look out for those who need to prove to themselves or others that they are rooting out and nailing the incompetent or immoral.  God forbid they think you are stupid, crazy, or evil.  They may also be like some cops: ticket fanatics.  (4) These above two phenomena happen in all social situations.  ---  09/01/1994


Work, technique, social.  ---  Positive attitude can keep you employed.  If they like you because you are friendly, funny, and interesting, they will keep you around, even if you are not completely competent.  If they dislike you because you are unfriendly, depressed, angry, or boring, they will fire you even if you are competent.  ---  11/30/1996


Work, technique, social.  ---  Practice kissing up, even if they get cold or antagonistic.  "Yes" them.  Do not fight them openly.  ---  12/06/1993


Work, technique, social.  ---  Prepare a spiel of statements and answers, about my work, school, and philosophy, to put on resume and say at interviews.  ---  06/10/1994


Work, technique, social.  ---  Professional behavior.  Not mean, not jokey, not immature.  Respectable, hard working, well educated, career man.  Going legitimate means giving up certain detestable behavior that (1) Ruins your career socially, (2) Destroys your psychological state for your work and leisure, and (3) Sets a bad example.  ---  08/31/1993


Work, technique, social.  ---  Public relations: what you do vs. what they think your doing.  ---  12/30/1992


Work, technique, social.  ---  Resolve interpersonal conflicts completely without destroying or giving up everything you have worked (long and hard and lucky) for: goals, social relationships, etc.  ---  12/01/1993


Work, technique, social.  ---  Strategies.  Pros and cons of each.  Ingratiation vs. separation.  Ingratiation: contra: lose self, turn into wimp.  Separation: contra: conflict breaks out easily.  Degrees and forms of ingratiation: talk everyday, compliment often.  ---  12/06/1993


Work, technique, social.  ---  Techniques.  (1) Techniques to deal with bosses.  Techniques for bosses to use. (2) Techniques to deal with subordinates.  Techniques for subordinates to use.  (3) Techniques to deal with customers.  Techniques for customers to use.  (4) Techniques to deal with the work environment.  (5) Techniques to deal with the work culture.  ---  10/4/1999


Work, technique, social.  ---  Work on pitches and lines to describe and sell self in work marketplace.  Strong yet sensitive.  Rowdy with soulful eyes.  Tough yet sweet.  Academic with a wild side.  James Dean.  Johnny Depp.  Make them see (recall, recognize, remember) something good and rare.  Something they know is right, but lost sight of a long time ago.  Something archetypal, mythical, superhuman, godly, golden.  The key is to get them psyched, and sell your vision.  My pitch: I care about ideas, truth, learning, and the advancement of individuals and society.  ---  06/10/1994




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Paul Nervy Notes. Copyright 1988-2007 by Paul Nervy.